Monday, November 26, 2007
well..... things are great again.. after a day or 2 of shitness...
the place in bondi went haywire cos the stupid bitch that was leasing it out is a tripped out acid head hippy bitch.. she wouldn't let anyone speak 2 her to try and get our money back.. $500 is a lot of money when you're broke as fuck!!
the bitch agreed that we'd give her $500 and she'd let us stay in the room & give the $1300 later on with the rent later on as we got settled.. she was fine with it.. so we hurried up & gave her $500... then she fucken said... "you can move in.. end of the week".. then it became "you can move in start of next week"... then "ohhh.. i gotta check with my friend if it's okay because he pays for this house too".... after taking our money.. she failed to fucking mention that the decision wasn't hers to make!!! stupid fucking bitch..
i wish u get skin cancer. u leather faced mole!!
how can she rip people off like that? she knew we were new to sydney & struggling.. yet she had no fucking problem taking money off us... stupid bitch!!!!!
i hate her!!... fucken FRANCIS... yes.. beware of a leather faced, bleach blonde, hairy armpitted hippy tripper that smells like old dog!!! she'll take your money and try to pull a runner!!!..
anyways.. thanks to Mr.X & his mother.. they spoke to the mole and we're getting our money back on monday...
Mr.X originally planned to be nice & apologise just to shut her up and be nice.. ( i couldn't do it cos i was so angry )... but it didnt work.... so life-saving Mr.X's mother stepped in and showed the hippy hag a thing or 2 about Melbournians.. lol in ur face hippy!!!
neway.... we've now landed a place in Botany.. newly renovated.. our own bedroom.. no screaming kids... close to work.. TV!!!!! we're both really happy.....
That's all for now.... our last home cooked chinese/russian meal for a very long time....
xoxo
with love & hate
Miss.X
-P.S -
Thanks Mr.X's mother for all the help... i appreciate it more than you could imagine...
and also.. just for the record, i'm sorry for not being able to give you the information you wanted when your son left... i desperately wanted to.. but i had to respect his wishes...
I hope you & your daughter are both okay.. and im sorry for any problems caused... i love you guys like family... you're the closest to the real thing i've had (as you know.. mine's a bit non-family) .... Mr.X & i are both really happy.. he's back to himself.. the Mr.X i fell in love with.. he's happy.. happy on the inside & i can tell... and also.. dunno if u guys care.. but i haven't had a low since that time i pissed u guys off by knocking on your door @ 5am... i also apologise for that... my head wasn't right .... it was all for the right reasons.. but my head made all the wrong decisions..
Miss.B - i meant everything i said to you that night we chilled in the backyard.... you're one special chick & im sorry to you for the shit that happened.. i swear i did the best i could for your brother's sanity. i heard you're doing well... im happy for ya!!
i hope u both forgive me.. i made stupid mistakes
anyways... enough of that stuff.. it's gettin me a bit poo-ey... but anyways.. hope u guys can come up and visit sometime!!
xoxo!!!
Friday, November 23, 2007
umm... got wrecked last night @ a work mates house.. thanks Chris-Tina.. u rock bitch!
weed + beer after a few weeks of non-voluntary detox is great!!!!! we were fucken wrecked.. :) happy days... i drew on Chris' mirror and drew some wankery shit....
work's great... i get to watch movies & we have beer o'clock on friday.. basically our boss tells us to run across to the pub on our break to get ourselves beer lol... it was fun!!!
ooh and an update on mum... she went back to dad again... she doesn't like being alone.. fair enough but STOP DRAGGING ME INTO IT!!
Our cat Barry had 6 kittens... after 2 months of her disappearing... she walked up 2 the house to mum... got a bath... a good feed.. :).. then gave birth that night...
she's only got 5 kittens left cos she killed one by squishing it..... i guess shit happens..
life's still great ...
peep & poop time.. :)
much love & hate
-Miss.X-
Labels: kittens poop beer
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
here i am.. sitting @ my new friend's laptop.. i've made a few new friends but i'm working so much. working here is kinda like being back in high school.. just without as many dicks n whores. ^^
i haven't spoken to mum at all since the last post.. and i miss her heaps... wonder how she's doing... and on a totally unrelated subject... apparently our cat had kittens!!!! woo hoo.. fiesty kitty.. what a slut though... free pun for the whole neighbourhood cat community.. newaiz... working 2 jobs now... 7 days a week.. im not that tired.. but im sure it'll catch up with me....
Mr.X is working 5 days a week and currently looking for another 2nd job cos the other one was shit and the people were utter fucking cunts... FUCK YAZ!!!
we're moving into our place in Bondi on Monday!!! yay..i cant wait.. our car's shitting itself more & more everyday... and today some fucken dick face'd cunt side swiped me ... apparently i overtook him... er.. im sure if i overtook him the accident wouldn't have occured.. DICKHEADS.. STAY IN YOUR OWN FUCKING LANE!!
but i couldn't do shit cos the car's unregistered at the moment and it wouldn't really be worth the hassle.... im thinking of the little scratches n shit as character building lol.. ^^ why the fuck not mate...?!?!
i haven't had a low for so long... the last one i remember was the one i had a couple nights before we left for sydney.. i haven't cut or substance abused for ages... (having a spliff after work aint abuse!!)
i can officially say my depression is under control... god bless you Lexapro...
i thought i'd miss Melbourne a lot more than i do...i feel so refreshed in sydney... i guess i was burning the candle @ both ends back home...
Since being in Sydney... the only drug i've touched is weed... but then again.. it's eau naturale!
newaiz.. i gotta get my ass back into action n do some work...
life's really going well....
with much love & hate...
Miss.X
*mwOarz*
i haven't spoken to mum at all since the last post.. and i miss her heaps... wonder how she's doing... and on a totally unrelated subject... apparently our cat had kittens!!!! woo hoo.. fiesty kitty.. what a slut though... free pun for the whole neighbourhood cat community.. newaiz... working 2 jobs now... 7 days a week.. im not that tired.. but im sure it'll catch up with me....
Mr.X is working 5 days a week and currently looking for another 2nd job cos the other one was shit and the people were utter fucking cunts... FUCK YAZ!!!
we're moving into our place in Bondi on Monday!!! yay..i cant wait.. our car's shitting itself more & more everyday... and today some fucken dick face'd cunt side swiped me ... apparently i overtook him... er.. im sure if i overtook him the accident wouldn't have occured.. DICKHEADS.. STAY IN YOUR OWN FUCKING LANE!!
but i couldn't do shit cos the car's unregistered at the moment and it wouldn't really be worth the hassle.... im thinking of the little scratches n shit as character building lol.. ^^ why the fuck not mate...?!?!
i haven't had a low for so long... the last one i remember was the one i had a couple nights before we left for sydney.. i haven't cut or substance abused for ages... (having a spliff after work aint abuse!!)
i can officially say my depression is under control... god bless you Lexapro...
i thought i'd miss Melbourne a lot more than i do...i feel so refreshed in sydney... i guess i was burning the candle @ both ends back home...
Since being in Sydney... the only drug i've touched is weed... but then again.. it's eau naturale!
newaiz.. i gotta get my ass back into action n do some work...
life's really going well....
with much love & hate...
Miss.X
*mwOarz*
Labels: work weed kittens
Saturday, November 17, 2007
so currently i'm still working @ the shoe shop... things are great... still !! :D
i'm doing a lot of multiple sells which is impressing my managers... Mr.X had a trial at some place that sounds like 'ball sacks'.. not sure if he's landed it yet though...
i had an interview the other day for an office telemarketing/data entry job which has a great young fun environment... i received a call yesterday and i was successful.. i start on monday.. hours are 12-8pm which is great cos i get a sleep in!! yay... i love my sleep...
mum's still a run away and my sister's helped get her into some government help thing where they give her a place and she doesnt have to pay a cent for food or anything... i'm so proud of her for being so strong to leave dad... finally! i can say it was worth the wait... but if she does give into his pity calls... i guess i wont be disappointed cos it's always in the back of my mind...
She cant have any contact with anyone she knows for 6 weeks according to this program due to her safety.... so dad doesnt find out where she is.... Mr.X says it's like 'witness protection' hehe.. it's pretty cool... mum called me yesterday arvo while i was @ work and let me know she couldnt call me or i couldnt call her for 6 weeks... which is kinda hard but if it's in the interest of her safety... then i'm okay with it... she did go to china for 4 months with short phone calls every few weeks. So i guess it'll be easier... i feel quite anxious about this whole thing for some reason... but if i have any problems or want to speak to mum.. i have to go through my sister.. which is better than NO contact what so ever...
dad keeps calling the place we're living at ... (mum's friend's house) and asking about me & Mr.X .... it's fkn stupid cos i know he doesnt give a flying fuck... he's doing it just so he comes across as a "caring" father.. which is a total crock...
anyways... these kids are shitting both of us crazily.... but the good news is... we finally got onto some weed!!! woohoo... my friend in melb hooked us up with some guy in sydney who sells... he looks like a goodie goodie... and i guess he doesnt have much contact with females.... well that's what we think cos he gave us about 4gs for free lol.... no complaints from us!!
we're landed a place in Bondi... right by the beach.. it's beautiful... smells like old dog & is quite small... but it's share accomodation and we'd pretty much do anything to get out of this place we're @ now with screaming kids & weird looks.... im sick of hiding while having ciggies anyways!!
The place we got... we should be moving in within a week or so... the lady is obviously an ex-hippy.. she seems quite loaded... she use to breed golden retreivers.. she usually has 6 @ the house at any given time... no wonder the place smells like old dog.. lol.... but we both love animals so yeah...
summertime down in Bondi!! FUCK YEAH!!!!!
anyways... cheers big ears... im gettin into Tooheys!!...
with much love & freedom.... and not much hate...
Miss.X
i'm doing a lot of multiple sells which is impressing my managers... Mr.X had a trial at some place that sounds like 'ball sacks'.. not sure if he's landed it yet though...
i had an interview the other day for an office telemarketing/data entry job which has a great young fun environment... i received a call yesterday and i was successful.. i start on monday.. hours are 12-8pm which is great cos i get a sleep in!! yay... i love my sleep...
mum's still a run away and my sister's helped get her into some government help thing where they give her a place and she doesnt have to pay a cent for food or anything... i'm so proud of her for being so strong to leave dad... finally! i can say it was worth the wait... but if she does give into his pity calls... i guess i wont be disappointed cos it's always in the back of my mind...
She cant have any contact with anyone she knows for 6 weeks according to this program due to her safety.... so dad doesnt find out where she is.... Mr.X says it's like 'witness protection' hehe.. it's pretty cool... mum called me yesterday arvo while i was @ work and let me know she couldnt call me or i couldnt call her for 6 weeks... which is kinda hard but if it's in the interest of her safety... then i'm okay with it... she did go to china for 4 months with short phone calls every few weeks. So i guess it'll be easier... i feel quite anxious about this whole thing for some reason... but if i have any problems or want to speak to mum.. i have to go through my sister.. which is better than NO contact what so ever...
dad keeps calling the place we're living at ... (mum's friend's house) and asking about me & Mr.X .... it's fkn stupid cos i know he doesnt give a flying fuck... he's doing it just so he comes across as a "caring" father.. which is a total crock...
anyways... these kids are shitting both of us crazily.... but the good news is... we finally got onto some weed!!! woohoo... my friend in melb hooked us up with some guy in sydney who sells... he looks like a goodie goodie... and i guess he doesnt have much contact with females.... well that's what we think cos he gave us about 4gs for free lol.... no complaints from us!!
we're landed a place in Bondi... right by the beach.. it's beautiful... smells like old dog & is quite small... but it's share accomodation and we'd pretty much do anything to get out of this place we're @ now with screaming kids & weird looks.... im sick of hiding while having ciggies anyways!!
The place we got... we should be moving in within a week or so... the lady is obviously an ex-hippy.. she seems quite loaded... she use to breed golden retreivers.. she usually has 6 @ the house at any given time... no wonder the place smells like old dog.. lol.... but we both love animals so yeah...
summertime down in Bondi!! FUCK YEAH!!!!!
anyways... cheers big ears... im gettin into Tooheys!!...
with much love & freedom.... and not much hate...
Miss.X
Monday, November 12, 2007
To: Nobody
I'm fed up with the way your thoughtless actions and words effect my life and have been for nearly 21 years. You claim to be the foundation of our family.... you sure are... but only when it comes to us copping a fist to the head or a kick to the ribs.... among so many other obscure objects that happened to be lying in ur path of destruction that you've beaten us with.
You are the core to my depressive state.... i don't need to pay someone ridiculous amounts of money per hour to tell me that.... you are the reason why you have an estranged wife.... you are the sole person who has made my sister the bipolar bitch she so often snaps into being...
Mum, my sister & i have suffered enough emotional, mental and physical abuse dealt by your cowardly ways... You drove my sister to insanity & away from this ridiculous thing you call a "family." Mum has run away.... yet again. This time she's lied... you think she's gone interstate.... she's hiding cos she's scared of you! You kicked me out on my birthday... a long awaited relief i must say...
Your actions have spoken as clearly as your words... and have for a very long time...
Some say that men have difficulty in showing emotion... love....
But going onto 21 years and not seeing it at all has taken the absolute shits out of any fucking joke. All i wanted was a conversation longer than 5 seconds, comprising of more than you telling me what a failure & disappointment i've been.
I've given up all hope in you... No longer will i sit there awaiting another punch.
I no longer feel hate... nor love for you... i feel nothing... i'm not even angry anymore...
You don't deserve any part of me and now i've finally taken a stand.... you can't control me anymore... i wont let you fuck my head up any longer than you already have.... you've done enough damage!!
"if you haven't got anything nice to say... dont say anything at all..."
I've tried to help you so many times... i've begged mum to go back home to you after you've beaten her... because i felt sorry for you... i did actually feel something for you other than hate... at one time....
I refuse to lie there in bed crying myself to sleep... trying to figure out why you are the way you are... i've realised i will never know the answer... i've always wanted you to seek help... but i know now that you're beyond it....
This is the final goodbye dad...
Enjoy the alcohol.... i hope it was worth losing your friends, wife & children over.
I hope you feel pain... vulnerability... lonelilness... fear... despondency... emptiness... worthless... ugliness... weakness... and most of all... i hope you feel failure because you have in more ways than one...
i've hurt enough at the wrath of your fists & words
Goodbye
From the one you use to know as your daughter...
Thursday, November 8, 2007
Dearest Ms S...
You promised you'd keep the bubble making factory going when i left you...
I guess some promises just cant be kept...
You fought until now... with the fucking disease eating away at every part of you...
At least you saw it to your 50th birthday...
We didn't think you'd make it till Christmas this year... i'm hoping it wasn't a jinx...
Of all the girls, you never gave me a hard time about anything...
You were always interested in me as a person... as i were you...
Seems as though you've lived a great life... however cut short...
You were such a great person in every aspect... thank you for making work interesting...
They said we had to vitamise your food... but you hated the shit & wouldnt eat mashed up old people's food...
So.... i fed you dim sims :P~
I dont understand how you could've been dehydrated eventhough u were a on a f.b.c ....
obviously someone wasn't doing their job... and it ultimately cost you your life...
in hospital they said to put a feeding tube in... but you kept your dignity right up till the end and refused to be fed through a tube...
i know the person you are... you would've hated being fed thru a stupid tube...
Thank you for screaming out "you fucking bitch" to that mean lady who wouldnt let us pass on the walkway while we were going out for coffee...
Thank you for turning to me one morning while i was giving you breakfast and saying
"i trust you"
Thank you for asking me what Mr.X and i did last night... everytime i was showering you... eventhough everytime my answer was.. "nothing... we're too boring & broke"...
you just replied with a warm smile
Thank you for not judging me when i had problems & broke up with my ex...
Thank you for being brutally honest... for the smiles...
for the opportunity to have met such an amazing woman...
Although, sometimes you couldn't remember my name... i was never upset with you because you knew who i was... just not the name...
i knew it was the disease... not you
i always wondered...
why you thought all Italians were good in the sack...
(eventhough you apparently were never with any... lol bullshit mate)
what your fascination with grabbing everyone's arse was...
how u kept smiling & laughing.... in that depressive environment
I miss you Sal Bell... Shmelly... Bubble Making Factory... Stoner... hehe
but i know you're free now & that you hated MS
R.I.P beautiful
you'll forever be in my heart & remembered
with much love & heartache
Miss X
Wednesday, November 7, 2007
our car's dying... so we're slowly saving up to get that fixed...
everything's great... Mr.X & i are really happy...
last night i got my first foot & leg massage.. hehe it was awesome.. quite strange it didnt tickle!
im currently applying for a Receptionist job @ a brothel... something different i guess... apparently the money's good.. and NO i'm not going to work as one of the girls either...
Mr.X has told me to be careful.. but i havent even gotten onto the manager yet...
i hope i get the job.. it's only 4 nights a week and at this stage..
money's money
anyways... this net cafe is really muggy and the kid who looks about 7 across from me... keeps swearing @ whatever game he's playing .. it's quite disturbing..
with love & hate
Miss.X
Sunday, November 4, 2007
ooooh... well work has been great... its been 2 months since i last had a job and it's been such a great break.. but it's time to get back into the whole life bullshit habit stuff.. thing....
work is fucken tiring but i'll get use to it after a while.
the chick i work with keeps pinching sales off me... i'd bring out shoes for the customer n help with sizes n whatever... and when they decide to buy... the bitch brings up the sale and just sits @ the register.. lucky we're not getting any commission anyway or i'd have quit the 2nd shift... stupid mole...
she keeps trying to tell me how to sell and use the register... which is stupid because she's working in a family run business with no formal retail training what so ever .. and most of the jobs i've worked at have involved selling/upselling & register work.... IM NOT STUPID !!
but besides that... work is great... no air conditioning in the store though.. which sux.... but nothing's better than a sweaty day @ work & coming home to a nice cool shower...
god damn.. we're staying with family friends & they have 2 young kids which are SOOOO cute.. but fuck me dead.. they're sooooo naughty and are starting to do my head in...
i can tell ricki's had enough of them because yesterday when i went to work (6 hour shift) ricki tagged along and said he'd rather sit in the car for 6 hours than stay with the kids another day LOL..
we've both decided we're never going to have kids...
i wanna get my tubes tied.. just in case but it's a bit drastic... jeebus.. and to think i wanted kids by 21.. fuck!! lol...
other than that.... @ night when we sit outside watchin sunset with a ciggie & chattin.... at any given moment there's about 3 bats above-head and it's awesome!! bats are too cool!!
The weather's quite humid.. which use to drive me insane... for the first few days it did but im slowly getting use to the muggy weather...
the days are hot & humid... then followed by a clean crisp cold air in the night.. i'm loving it!
there's storms quite often here which Mr.X and i both love... the rain pours overnight sometimes... it's so nice..
im not really missing Melbourne too much... although i do miss my family & some friends... not many cos i fucked a lot of them off before coming because i realised they're shit.. :)
that's all for now... ooh
im slowly compiling a scrapbook of our trip.. should be good!!
with love & hate
Miss.X
oooh . p.s... im learnin how to aussie hip hop rap stuff lol
S2'n
- The Funkoars - The Greatest Hit -
LADIES!!!.. is that a bun in the oven.
want some lovin'.... better suck that gut in....
wipe your mouth off
wipe your blouse off..
Sound off..
HOWWWWWWWWW
i love a dumb chick when the smartest thing comin out her mouth's my DICKKKk
....
...PELICAN!!!!...
..bought a 2nd hand g-string & bee sting tits...
... if ur livin the dream.. i wanna hear you scream... i dont pay full price for busfare!!!....
work is fucken tiring but i'll get use to it after a while.
the chick i work with keeps pinching sales off me... i'd bring out shoes for the customer n help with sizes n whatever... and when they decide to buy... the bitch brings up the sale and just sits @ the register.. lucky we're not getting any commission anyway or i'd have quit the 2nd shift... stupid mole...
she keeps trying to tell me how to sell and use the register... which is stupid because she's working in a family run business with no formal retail training what so ever .. and most of the jobs i've worked at have involved selling/upselling & register work.... IM NOT STUPID !!
but besides that... work is great... no air conditioning in the store though.. which sux.... but nothing's better than a sweaty day @ work & coming home to a nice cool shower...
god damn.. we're staying with family friends & they have 2 young kids which are SOOOO cute.. but fuck me dead.. they're sooooo naughty and are starting to do my head in...
i can tell ricki's had enough of them because yesterday when i went to work (6 hour shift) ricki tagged along and said he'd rather sit in the car for 6 hours than stay with the kids another day LOL..
we've both decided we're never going to have kids...
i wanna get my tubes tied.. just in case but it's a bit drastic... jeebus.. and to think i wanted kids by 21.. fuck!! lol...
other than that.... @ night when we sit outside watchin sunset with a ciggie & chattin.... at any given moment there's about 3 bats above-head and it's awesome!! bats are too cool!!
The weather's quite humid.. which use to drive me insane... for the first few days it did but im slowly getting use to the muggy weather...
the days are hot & humid... then followed by a clean crisp cold air in the night.. i'm loving it!
there's storms quite often here which Mr.X and i both love... the rain pours overnight sometimes... it's so nice..
im not really missing Melbourne too much... although i do miss my family & some friends... not many cos i fucked a lot of them off before coming because i realised they're shit.. :)
that's all for now... ooh
im slowly compiling a scrapbook of our trip.. should be good!!
with love & hate
Miss.X
oooh . p.s... im learnin how to aussie hip hop rap stuff lol
S2'n
- The Funkoars - The Greatest Hit -
LADIES!!!.. is that a bun in the oven.
want some lovin'.... better suck that gut in....
wipe your mouth off
wipe your blouse off..
Sound off..
HOWWWWWWWWW
i love a dumb chick when the smartest thing comin out her mouth's my DICKKKk
....
...PELICAN!!!!...
..bought a 2nd hand g-string & bee sting tits...
... if ur livin the dream.. i wanna hear you scream... i dont pay full price for busfare!!!....
Labels: aussie hip hop, work sydney melbourne
Friday, November 2, 2007
so....
now we're staying @ a family friend's place in some suburb in sydney and it's great.. they've got 2 little boys and they're adorable as fuck.!
i had my first day @ work today... some urban wear / sports wear / shoe store... apparently the owners have 3 stores in the same shopping centre and i'll be moved from store to store as they need staff.
they pay's pretty good.. better than most retail jobs & more than my previous job too... expensive shoes... working right by the beach.. nice work mates... life's pretty good..
we're slowly gettin back up onto our feet and im glad my family friend's are nice enough to take us in like their own kids. Getting home cooked meals every night is something i've missed heaps too!!
being outta work for 2 months has taken its toll on me... i did a 4 hour shift and i forgot how tiring retail was & how hard it was on your feet... oh well a job's a job aye...
the pork rolls round here are awesome!!!! lots of strange people around here though... some guy walked past me today and made weird sex faces @ me and i nearly dropped my guts on the spot!..
Mr.X is looking for work at the moiment and has a trial on tuesday @ some cafe... should be good... so we've decided to stay here for a while until sydney becomes too small for us... newaiz.. gotta look for better directions to work so i'll leave it @ that...
with love & hate
Miss.X
p.s i dont really miss melb that muh funnily enough....
(my *see* stopped working ... os we're in a shitty fuken net afe.... -_-)
Labels: work sydney melbourne
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